Does it have anything to do with love? I have loved much without commitment!
Certainly love can be a factor in that motivation
but commitment goes in a much different direction from love.
I can negotiate an "arms length" contract with someone whom I have never met and that is commitment! ! ! I promise to deliver this if you promise to deliver that!
Ten million dollars for XYZ goods . . . Now that's commitment!
But then there is that other nuance.
I promise to love you if you promise to love me. -or- I promise to love you forever and do everything possible to make your life full of joy if you promise to love me forever and do everything possible to make my life full of joy and vice versa and vice versa etc. forever!
No! love is love but commitment . . . There is also the thing about loyalty
commitment implies an expression of loyalty. "You are my best friend and brother and I will always be there for you!" That means you don't fuck my girlfriend even if she is pretty and willing! That means you bail me out of jail if I get a DWI even though beforehand you warned me about my drinking! That means you get me out of the bar before the big guy figures out that I was hitting on his wife! That means you got my back when I'm in the woods and kill the Grizzly who is about to maul me! That means you tell me that it's inappropriate to make a plan for simultaneously shooting all the people at DMV and all insurance agents! That means that you listen seriously while I explain that I am actually the prophet who will fight off the world at the last battle of Armageddon. . .
So If I say to you "I love you, do you love me?" I just want to know how you feel.
I want to know if there is any possibility that you could have feelings sufficient to motivate you in the future to become my partner. A basis for something real and not a pipe dream. A foundation that can be built upon, not a sandy sunshine beach that will wash away with the first sign of adversity.
If there is no Love there is no possibility of a future.
But Love is just the prerequisite. The rest has to come from there and has to be sought and worked for . . . A good life lived is not the realm of a lazy man and a committed love that lasts for eternity similarly requires valiance!